Batman Movie Review!

I watched about four or five minutes of Batman Forever on TV today (I got a sweet new set). Two things struck me as being a little strange. First, why is "Two face" called 'two-face'? Technically, he doesn't even have one complete face. Let's face it; if he were a real person and he only had one of his alleged two "faces," he would probably be known around town as "half-face," not "full-face" or any derivative thereof. To claim that the man has two faces is just laughable.
Secondly, doesn't the stately Wayne Manor have a dryer? In the scene following the Two Face/Riddler introduction (to each other) that I caught, young Master Dick (what a strange title) does a whole French Debutante dance number with his laundry, much to the shock of an onlooking Alfred. The moves all revolve around him fastidiously lining his dripping garments upon a clothes line that runs across the laundry room in Bruce's swingin' bachelor mansion. It was a totally bizarre scene (in both film terms and colloquialisms) from the get-go. Not sure what they were going for, but it gives some creedence to Wertham's argument. Anyway, I can't believe he doesn't have a dryer. Get with the times, man.

A little well-earned R&R

I'll be on vacation for the next week. If you need to contact me, please write to: Your Anus, c/o your taint.

The World of Steve Ditko

Yesterday, I finished reading the new biography of Steve Ditko, "Strange and Stranger." Now, needless to say, I am a huge fan of Steve Ditko. In fact, to a certain extent I like him much better than Jack Kirby. Ditko's seminal run on "The Amazing Spider-Man" ranks as one of my all-time favorite comic series. It was spot-on, and this book does a good job of painting some background information about the time period and the extent of Ditko's involvement.
Some folks have been criticizing this book; the same group that criticized the recent Evanier biography of Kirby. I've enjoyed both books, and the artwork reproductions have been wonderful. If I had one complaint about the Ditko book, it's that it could have used some more original repros, as opposed to primarily comic scans. Then again, maybe there were a lot; I can't really remember right now. I know that the Kirby one had a ton of rare shit, though.
Anyway, sure, this isn't as extensive as Harvey's recent bio of Milton Caniff, but it sure was a pleasure to read through. It's a shame that Ditko's obsession with Ayn Rand and Objectivism pretty much shattered his career. Then again, his style was so diametric to that prevalent during the 1980s, he probably wouldn't have lasted, anyway. Another interesting point that author Blake Bell drives home (at one point, even breaking the objectivist voice of an impartial narrator) of how much original artwork Ditko has, and the approximate value thereof.
All in all, a fine read.

War Heroes: MIA

Well, I'm usually tickled pink with my service from DCBS (the Discount Comic Book Service, natch!). This month, however, I was only tickled a light shade of magenta. You see, when I received my monthly batch of funnybooks, one was missing. And it wasn't just a mere, lame old comic that was missing; it was one I was looking forward to for quite some time. Specifically, Mark Millar's "War Heroes" number one.
I buy pretty much everything Millar does. As far as mainstream superhero comics go, he's the best. Yeah, I said it; he's the best. The best currently churning out a half dozen titles per month, anyway. Naturally I was excited to see the beginning of his latest series. I was even more excited when I read that this series was based on Mark's rejected premise for "Ultimates 3." I can't imagine why the fuck Marvel would reject one of his storylines, especially for a series he pretty much started from scratch and shot to the top of the charts. Especially especially if they were going to replace it with something by that sentimental old hack, Jeph Loeb. But I digress.
The problem is, apparantly, that Diamond "shorted" orders on War Heroes #1, so I didn't get one. This really sucks, especially since I pre-ordered this damn book about seven months ago (alright, it was probably only three or four, but you get the picture). I'm reminded of that Jerry Seinfeld routine about taking reservations versus holding reservations. They took my reservation, but they sure as hell didn't hold it.
I'm guessing that DCBS is not really at fault here, and that Diamond fucked up. Who knows; maybe Image did. All I know is, I went to a few comic shops last month while I was on vacation in Boston, and I saw plenty of copies of War Heroes sitting around. I could have picked any of them up, but I put each one back on the shelf, knowing that my copy would be awaiting me at the end of the month. Guess I was wrong.
One more thing: Waaaaaahhh! Just thought I'd beat the name-callers to the punch. I realize how big of a baby I am being.

UPDATE: I got the comic in Philly last weekend. It sucked.

Book Reviewed!

How long do you think you'll be able to read this particular blog entry? Let's face it; time is pretty cheap these days. Have you seen ninety percent of what passes as entertainment on the internet these days? If you actually have seen ninety percent, that's amazing. I mean, really; the internet is pretty much endless. It's like the universe and the solar system and all that space-shit combined. It never ends. Kind of like this blog entry.
If you're still reading this blog entry (heretofore mentioned as "BE-Blog Entry"), don't pat yourself on the back just yet. It's a boring entry, and the fact that you've made it this far is really nothing to congratulate yourself about. Especially since, though originally intended to be a never-ending, tedious, long-winded diatribe, this entry simply ends without